Anger: A Misunderstood Emotion in the Indian Society

 Anger is an emotion that is expressed as a result of frustration of needs, goals or the feeling of being wronged by someone or something. 

Anger is a misunderstood emotion in India. Most people are not able to understand that anger, like happiness, is an emotion. More often than not, our society teaches us to take offence when someone expresses their anger. In my work as a school psychologist, I often observed that when a student expressed their anger towards a teacher, s/he was labelled as being disrespectful to elders. Soon enough, every teacher in the school would assume that the student is aggressive and to not allow him/her to express any opinions in the classroom. Knowingly or unknowingly, the teachers have developed an impression of this student based on one solitary experience and generalized it to an extent that 'being disrespectful' has become all that the child represents for them. 

We as a society need to learn how to detach anger from disrespect. Anger is an emotion expressed when someone is hurt. If we are not giving our children the space to express their anger, they will soon learn to repress it. If repressing of emotions becomes a pattern it might show up in the form of frequent uncontrollable outbursts of emotions sometime in the future. Children not only learn how to react in a certain manner through role modelling of adults but also learn the expected reactions to certain emotions. Ultimately, we are raising more intolerant individuals.

Expressing Anger ≠ disrespect.

Emotions, whether they make us sad, angry, fearful or happy are important to experience. Emotions are what makes us human beings. We need to help people learn how to express different emotions. When we feel happy, we want to share the thing that made us happy with everyone. If anger makes you want to punch, push, argue with the person or thing that made you angry - think about how it would help you? Emotions have a tendency of engulfing you just like ocean waves. When we experience emotions at a stronger intensity, they can have unpredictable consequences. In order to have a richer emotional experience, we need to understand what each emotion makes us feel and what are our usual patterns of reaction. To enable this learning every school in India should include lessons on socio-emotional learning and raise more self-aware individuals. Understanding the origin of a particular behaviour and learning to appreciate beauty emotions is essential for our own well-being.